We all experience it for a whole bunch of different reasons. One of the big reasons being that our expectations dont always match our reality.
In dating, I’ve been burned so many times that I’ve began to expect everything to go horribly wrong. When it doesnt, Im always pleasantly surprised. But I can’t go around with such low expectations of people and events.
On the flip side, sometimes I expect too much. We all do. And while some things are cultural norms, every single person was brought up differently in a completely different background and so sometimes those so-called norms are thrown right out the window.
Right now that Im trying to work things out with Carlsbad, I’m expecting things to go a bit faster. Hell, I’d settle for a brisk pace instead of the snails pace it seems to be taking. I’ve turned away dudes left and right and all Im getting in return are texts with pet names such as ‘lover’ and ‘mami.’ Uh, what?
I’m not expecting a midnight serenade outside my bedroom window but can I least be the one to reply to a text instead of being the one to initiate them?
So I told him to “try harder” last night.
On the one hand, Yes I would totally LOVE for this dude to step up his game! Buuuuut I have to remember, he is not me. He doesnt move at my million miles per hour pace. Shit, for all I know he may think he’s already bringing me the moon and the stars because he’s using pet names instead of my actual name. I.dont. know.
But whatever it is, I can’t hold him to my expectations and then be disappointed when he doesnt reach them. I’m not saying he doesnt have to put in any effort. That shit’ll get old reaaaal quuick. But, in the meantime, while we’re still getting a feel for one another I’ll just have to sit back and let it happen on its own.
Now excuse me while I get comfortable. I have a feeling this may take a bit.